Some people never grow ‘cause they’re trapped in their contradictions, they never accept that they did a mistake, they spoke bad, they believed in the wrong things — but they insist that they were always right, even if they were wrong. It needs courage to say, “ I was wrong at that time at that incident; I couldn’t understand things properly, I was emotionally charged and so and so …”
Betrand Russell said right:
“The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, and wiser people so full of doubts.”
There are lots of things to end anxiety, but this time I’m suggesting a simple understanding to end the anxiety.
Whenever you feel anxious, just find a corner, sit there, close your eyes and find out the things which are pulling each-other, means contradicting each other. If things are not in your hand, then you can’t do anything, right! If things are in your hand, maybe, you need some resources or time to end those contradictions which are pulling you apart. But, we assume there are contradictions and nothing can happen in a moment, other than the anxiety.
Just a month ago a girl wrote me, when she woke up from the sleep; she was able to see everything with the closed eyes. And a Metaphysician clarifies if a person sleeps with lower consciousness; unconsciously, he might do astral-travel in lower dimensions and can meet with strange looking creatures or can see the bad dreams.
The girl who felt miraculous experience was at high consciousness, somehow. And the people who see bad dreams are with lower consciousness because with higher consciousness the bad dreams or astral travel to lower dimension isn’t possible.
The Upanishads say, we have the astral body and it works with the thoughts, and during sleep when the conscious control over the physical body subsides, the astral body starts working according to the thoughts; if thoughts are positive and strong, we can see positive dreams; if they are negative, we can see negative dreams.
We all know that "love" is never the matter of mind. It is the expression of heart. But, what if, when somebody starts loving you with the mind – not with the heart.
Two ways of the mind
Third way of the heart
Two ways of the mind
When somebody looks lovable and s/he draws our attention and we get fall in love with that person. Here, the cause and end of love is that person only, starts from him and ends with him – that person plays a major part; we just like mosquitoes get into the net. This love never satisfies as the mood and behavior of that person (which was looking enticing initially) gets changed.
The second type of love comes when we think we can use the expression "love" as a thing, and it does not come-out from either of the person. It is just an imitation of love; bodies come together but mentally live miles apart.
Third way of the heart
"Thoughts create the thinker" says J. Krishnamurti, in the same way "actions create the actor." Without thoughts there is no thinker – only thoughtlessness comes, which is an awareness, a consciousness in itself, and in this state everything is perceived (not with any mental conditioning) in its true form – and truth starts manifesting.
How to practice thoughtlessness?
The practice is "not to practice," you can’t use a thought to stop another thought. How a thought can stop another thought? Even, a mantra is also a thought; a mind keeps on repeating it and repeating it. Whatever technique or ritual we do to stop and control thoughts – all are thoughts themselves. That’s why it becomes hard to control over thoughts.
Then what to do?
We lose confidence because we forget the source and on periphery, there is only inferior, hypnotized and feeble life.
We lose confidence because:
…and so many things.
Biggest harm in lack of confidence
Listen carefully! "We are easily persuaded by anybody who promises us to ease out above factors." And, we are ready to pay any price.
How to get confidence?
I had to complete and publish this post yesterday night, but I slept early thinking about "how knowledge is limited without experience (original source)," and we think this knowledge is everything, this everything turns into limited memory and gives limited thoughts and we feel hell out of life. Actually, lots of things were coming into my mind, but as soon as I thought about "limited knowledge," all he clouds disappeared from my sky, and I felt clear and calm.
Limited Knowledge > Limited Memory > Limited Thoughts = Conflict in relationship
Limited Knowledge> Limited Memory> Limited Thoughts= Unreal relationship
If we talk about conflict in relationship, it is also because of limited knowledge that drives limited thoughts, and limited thoughts give conflicts, isn’t it?
Youngers look guidance from elders, and when elders speak bad and act bad, then what’d be the impact on youngers’ mind and emotions? Not every elder takes care of it; if you do for your youngers, I’m proud of you!
In India, people put parents equal to God, and it is said if you take few rounds of your parents, you take round of the whole universe. It is good to regard our loving parents. But, what if, when parents start spoiling the life of children? You can say, no parent "wants" it, true! But, youngers more learn by behavior, they learn by live examples, just "wanting" is not enough, "doing" is much more important.
A person grows, makes a career, and starts looking for a mate…live with a mate. But, both of them nothing work for "What the younger generation will learn from them?" And, when the children come, they start making them learned their own whims and fancies. When I observe a child, I find after certain age, the children start adopting (consciously or subconsciously) parents psychology (good or bad), and start doing it in their lives. And if you observe a child, you can tell about its parents. But, this isn’t good – a child’s mental and emotional state need to be unspoiled and it comes when parents have values, qualities and a good character in life.
I know many people who know good meditation techniques, and when I ask them "Why they are not meditating?" They say "Yar! Mood is not good, that’s why unable to do it regularly." Well, meditation also needs a good mood, isn’t it? It is true! Meditation needs healthy mind and body.
Sometimes, we are so much filled up with life, a series of questioning starts: "Why this is so? Why with me? What I do? I didn’t do anything, who is God? So on and on…" And no advice, no spiritual book, and no meditation technique works – feels so obsessed and frustrated.
And, in this time, when someone tries to comfort – an up and down of revolution and suppression of mood starts…and with closed eyes and heavy breath, a person becomes question mark to himself. Well, things might be harder or lighter than that, depends upon individual to individual.
Video source: TED
Note: This talk contains graphic images and description of violence.
If you don’t know what happens with children and women, you need to watch this video. If you don’t know after being gang-raped, and being ostracized & stigmatized, how a woman fights against sexual slavery, you need to watch this video.