Posts Tagged ‘Relationships’
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You saw once, got hooked in and fell in love. Then what happens to this love after some time, after few months or may be after few years. Hooked off! It is strange what you never get, you remain hooked in and what you get … later on you become hooked off. Well, this is not love; love never exists in transition. The love stories: “I’m in love,” to “I’m broke off,” show the hooked in and hooked off scenario. This is not love sweetheart!
Love never appears nor disappears (yes, lust and some expectations are!), much like the truth it is ever present, ever flowing within your own sweet “heart,” and in the “cave of your heart” the real lover exists, which ever waits you to return to it; it never deceives, it never lies, it never betrays – when you return to it, the eternal romance happens.
The external lovers are the projection of the mind and exist in transition, they will leave you one day. External lover is uncertain; what you get, you are bound to lose – this is “fact.”
Your real Self is your real lover, and this lover is beyond the mind, time and appearances; when your mind falls back to your own Self, the timeless romance happens; where, there is only bliss and ecstasy. Like the Meera fell in love with Krishna; Krishna is none other than the real Self (the Atman) … like the Chantanya Mahaprabhu fell in love with his own Self. The Self is the real lover; it is the truth, God and everything.
Around 1800, and more people want to know this and the answer is "yes" why not?
But there are two conditions:
There mustn’t be "attraction" between friends.
There mustn’t be "repulsion" between friends.
Whenever these two things come the friendship between a male and female is spoiled. And it mostly happens in growing age when things are not taken properly. If you are looking friendship with opposite sex, you need to take care of both of them, otherwise friendship can be soiled.
Most of us get ditched and hurt in life because we fail to understand people as they are, whether they are family members, lovers, gurus, friends or anybody.
Tell me one thing, if we don’t understand the "false" qualities then how can we understand "true" qualities? Blind faith, where we don’t know what is true and what is untrue ends our life in nonsense.
The difference between an animal and a human is of decision making, to judge and analysis – but we are made learned to be non-judgmental. Is life possible without judgments? It is quite possible if we want to live like animals and goaded by somebody.
Being non-judgmental looks comforting when one is depressed, full of tension and want to forget something superficially, but just to "forget" doesn’t work until the problem is solved from the roots.
In second case, being non-judgmental also looks good when one meets with stranger, but as far as safety with stranger is concerned non-judgment is not good.
Meaning of judgment
Yesterday night, I finished watching one of J. Krishnamurti video, it was little longer than an hour, and it took me more than 5 hours to listen & understand it by play and replay, one sentence many-times, mainly because the wisdom of J. Krishnamurti was so profound, so unique, I laughed and enjoyed the whole night.
What I learned from J. Krishnamurti, I broke it into six parts; this is the first article of those interrelated parts. Herein, we are talking, as in the title (What’re conflicts in you? Analysis never works), and in next articles will be talking about three main causations of conflicts one by one (they are: "what I’m and what I should be," "time," and "thoughts"), and then in next article, how to have real relationship in life, and next how to have freedom and security in life.
If you don’t know about J. Krishnamurti, let me tell you, he isn’t a philosopher, he isn’t a thinker, he isn’t a Guru, and he just helps people with what he has realized in his life. He is amongst the rarest individuals to whom I truly like.
Now, come to our issues…
Each of us has unique ways to make our unique parents happy. And, ways are so unique, hardly an outsider gets to know what’s going on between parents and children. I don’t know what your ways are to make your parents happy (…want to know for sure) but I can suggest you few more extra things which can make your parents more proud on you.
Have good friends: all parents like to see good friends around their children, no one like bad company; so, be wiser in choosing your friends. Whatever types your friends would be, their vibrations would reach to your parents through you. Always make good choices in making good friends.
Kick off bad girl-friend or boy-friend: this is worst situation parents have to deal with, when they see their son or daughter is mad about some %#%#%%# (I don’t know what to say). I don’t say they are bad, but make good choices and good distances to avoid unnecessary issues.
It is first love most of the time (if, I’m not wrong). When, a “young bird” with “early wings” starts to fly without knowing “weather” would be pleasant or unpleasant, and who would be waiting outside to make comfort or discomfort. Sometimes, the young bird returns safely back to home. But, as far as, the word “Ex” is concerned, there is some problem, the bird is “wounded,” and that wound turns into “memory.”
With that memory, even the wings are stronger and weather causes no disturbance, “now.” That bird feels discomfort. I don’t know whether this bird is “you,” but I can suggest some solutions to this bird.
Just a couple of months ago, I got a mail mentioning "I’m a girl of certain age, doing so and so and I don’t have a boyfriend," the girl was sad, even boys can also be sad at times. And I was just wondering, if there would be any formula or technique which might give 100 %( sure) results, then, a man would be having many girls at a time and same would be for girls. The mantra like KLEEM helps in attracting, but there is no "fixed calculation" if you chant it, say, 10K or 50K times you are bound to have a man or woman, or some material object you desire for.
If you know the history of Ramayana, a Hindu epic, where a person, named Ravan kidnapped the wife of Ram, and tried to attract and allure her for a number of years having her in some part of his kingdom. But, he couldn’t attract her. I’m not saying that every man or woman is Ravan and can’t attract to other person. I mean to say deliberate attraction brings manipulations (…and that turns in hate and distances, most of the times), each one of us need to like a flower which never tries to attract anybody, but people are drawn to that.
As far as, physical body is concerned, both man and woman are matter – made up of five elements, i.e., earth, water, fire, air and ether. And a matter can attract or repulse another matter – call it two poles of a magnet. The magnetic field can be produced by words, thoughts, emotions, expressions, behavior, character, vibrations or by body language. And, it can be either positive or negative.
As, people run after short-cuts (not you, but most of, not thinking about character and values in life), there is a mantra, which I’ve mentioned many times before, it is KLEEM mantra. It is supposed to produce the vibrations to attract the matter. As in matter man, woman, children, money, property, relationship…everything, comes. Chanting of this mantra is supposed to attract one or many things, we desire for.
You can chant this mantra, you can listen its mp3 or can write it on a piece of paper – 108 or 1008 times; or, more or less times than that, as you like. The only matter is: mantra needs to create vibrations.
We all have flaws, sometimes lighter and sometimes harder, and in same or different areas of life. It is easy to come into a relationship, but the knack: “how to maintain it?” only few people know, and that’s the secret of their happy relationship.
Below are four tips to maintain a relationship, each one of us needs to work on them. Tips may go any longer, but it is good if we work on core issues this time. Have a look:
Check the seed of fight
Seed is the “reason” of fight. What happens: people forget the reason and start inviting other unharmonious issues of life, and the seed is lost in a tree, full of thorns, more fights and hell of life. What we need is just to be concentrated on the seed, work on it, so that it could not make roots and produce thorns in our life. And, never try to forget or to suppress the seed, the seed is bound to grow in suppression also, in suppression it will make longer roots and near future calamities in relationship may take place.
You need not to please any person for this. If this would happen, all the good people would have become “mad” in pleasing bad people (who always look for it).
Some people touch our heart, but we never explicitly say it, we know within. And those people do nothing to make us happy, they are on their path… but, they touch our heart. The reasons are below, the same reason (that I found) if we apply in our lives, we can also touch the heart of other people.
Reframing & transformation
Re-frame means to re-build again to any talk or to any thought or to any idea in a way that it looks constructive and leaves positive impact on others. And, some people are so expert in re-framing, you get soothing and healing effects from them. This is an art, grows when we have knowledge and understanding to see things from wider perspectives. When, something is reframed, transformation in others is provoked.